Seattle Star Publisher Outed as African American
Turns out seeing is actually believing. Revealed: the actual race of the Seattle Star’s publisher.
Starbucks & Amazon drone fleets crash into Big Bertha, create Skynet, Humanity DOOMED!!
Skynet born in Seattle’s tech collision.
Crop Circle Found in Oregon; Republicans Blame Cylvia Hayes
A Firefox crop circle appears in Oregon. Is it a Jihadist takeover?
Starbucks Tests Drone Fleet Deliveries
Starbucks tries out their latest advance: drone deliveries. Sam Luis Obispo reports.
Real Estate Developers Declare War on Seattle
Real estate developers held a press conference in Seattle today to provide the public with information regarding their new campaign entitled, “Tear It All Down!”
Starbucks Barista Stops Traffic for Hours Discussing Race
The main difficulty of discussing race in Seattle: it stops traffic. Pam Carter reports.
Starbucks: #RaceTogether Successful In Many US Branches
According to a new statement released by the Seattle coffee giant, the campaign may have done more for progress in race relations than people thought possible.
Mayor Murray Appoints Mark Sidran New SPD Liaison
“I am humbled and excited to have this extraordinary opportunity,” said Sidran, who, if confirmed, would be Seattle’s first person to man what many in city hall are calling the city’s new Police Czar position.
Tell All Book Explains Dori Monson’s Mental Breakdown
Is Dori Monson really an alien from outer space? Or is he just a dope fiend? Mark Taylor-Canfield hits the investigative trail and finds a new tell-all book.
ISIS Leaks Cronut Recipe
The power of food triumphs over all.
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